Africa - Week 1

Africa is not really anything like what I expected. Granted I was told over and over to have an open mind and not go in with expectations so maybe its just that I didn't really know what to expect? The area I'm staying in is so green, not at all the dry landscape you usually think of when you think of Africa. It was even cloudy and rainy for a lot of the first week. I never really thought I would be cold in Africa, ha!

I'm volunteering with Cross Cultural Solutions in Moshi, Tanzania. One of the reasons I chose this volunteer organization was because of how organized and structured they are, they really take care of everything. The house we live in is fantastic and all of our meals are provided. They even try to throw in some American food every once in a while. 

Ok so maybe they don't take care of EVERYTHING, you do have to do your own laundry or pay to send it out. So far I'm choosing to send it out :)

My volunteer placement is at Mageraza Nursery School, its located inside a prison complex. I'm just going to gloss over the prison part because I try not to think about it too much. From my very limited understanding, the nursery school is for the police officers' children. I'm in a classroom teaching English to 2-5 year olds. 

Luckily I have another volunteer with me, I don't think I could do this on my own. Its so much more challenging than I had thought, mostly because of the logistics, not the actual teaching. The school has very few resources and/or teachers. There was one day we had over 80 children just in our one classroom! The other volunteer and I had moments where we looked at each other in sheer panic. 

The children are so precious though. They don't know much English but absolutely know how to say teacher and start chanting it when we arrive. It sounds a little more like "tee-cha" but walking up to school where the kids can't wait to run and hug you is pretty awesome :)

Bittersweet Goodbye

Its been a looooong time since I last posted and I was actually considering just shutting down my blog but as I read through the posts it was so wonderful to have those memories recorded. There were pictures I didn't even remember taking, in particular pictures with a sweet friend of mine who passed away. I decided to keep the blog...and then life got really crazy!

Here's a short synopsis -
1. Decided to volunteer in Africa
2. Quit my job
3. Packed up all my stuff and moved out of my apartment
4. Left NYC to drop Rosie in Arkansas
5. Flew to Africa

This all happened in a little over a month, maybe two. For most of the time I felt like I was running around like a crazy person. I had always thought that I was a planner but apparently that was only in comparison to John :)

If you know me, you know that I had been talking about leaving NYC for a while but couldn't ever decide where to move. Somewhere along the way I got tired of trying to figure everything out and came to the conclusion that instead I would just take it one step at a time. I knew that a transition between cities would be a great time to travel/volunteer and why not take the chance when you have one, so here I am currently in Africa!

Its all been so overwhelming and intense but also surreal; to get to travel for two whole months is pretty much a dream come true! Anyway, I'll have more to post about Africa but I wanted to put a few pictures up of my apartment just so I had them to look back on.

My apartment was such a sanctuary for me in what has turned out to be an incredible journey. If I could say thank you to NYC I would, it will always be a very special place for me. Its where my life once fell apart but I learned how to put it back together and stand on my own and for that I am very proud.

My Tattoo

A while ago I got a tattoo :)

I had contemplated one for a long time but could never think of something I wanted to have on my body for the rest of my life. However, going through the process of separation and divorce I found myself clinging to a verse from 1 Corinthians about love.

"Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance." - 1 Corinthians 13:7

I know, I know, 1 Corinthians 13 is usually used in wedding ceremonies. At first I read this as I should never give up on my marriage and I should always stay hopeful, but the more I read it I started to realize that God is the one whose love never gives up or loses faith. Even though the man who promised to love me forever changed his mind, God will never do the same!

This became hugely symbolic for me as I was struggling with the idea of taking my wedding ring off. As something I had worn for so long, it was a comfort to me, a sense of security, and a reminder of all the good times in our marriage. Taking my ring off was scary and so painful. I wanted my tattoo to be a new reminder of God's love, the man who will never leave me. And so, I modified a tattoo I had seen online of an infinity symbol with the word love to have the L become a cross.

My Anthem

One of the things that really resonated with me throughout this whole situation was the song "Oceans" by Hillsong United. The song is about God calling you out into a scary, unknown place where you can learn to truly trust in Him. Obviously it makes sense why I love the song :)

The line about keeping my eyes above the waves was one I repeated to myself over and over. If I could just remind myself that God is so much bigger than what I was going through at that moment and focus on Him instead it really helped!

"Oceans (Where Feet May Fail)" by Hillsong United

You call me out upon the waters

The great unknown where feet may fail

And there I find You in the mystery

In oceans deep

My faith will stand

And I will call upon Your name

And keep my eyes above the waves

When oceans rise

My soul will rest in Your embrace

For I am Yours and You are mine

Your grace abounds in deepest waters

Your sovereign hand

Will be my guide

Where feet may fail and fear surrounds me

You've never failed and You won't start now

So I will call upon Your name

And keep my eyes above the waves

When oceans rise

My soul will rest in Your embrace

For I am Yours and You are mine

Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders

Let me walk upon the waters

Wherever You would call me

Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander

And my faith will be made stronger

In the presence of my Savior

I will call upon Your Name

Keep my eyes above the waves

My soul will rest in Your embrace

I am Yours and You are mine

My Year

So its literally been a year since I last posted and it has been an intense year to say the least! Honestly it feels like its been even longer. This past year has probably been the toughest of my life but the whole thing has been an incredible growth experience and I am so excited to see where God is taking me.

For those of you who don't know, my husband of almost 9 years decided that he didn't want to be married anymore. Its so much more complicated but that's all I feel like diving into for now. John broke the news in January and moved out in March.

It was a long road to pick myself up off the floor and get to where I am now and I know I'm not done traveling, but I'm kind of proud of myself! Not to say I did it alone, I absolutely could not have survived this without God and my amazing family and friends. This has been such a learning experience in so many ways and one of them was me learning to lean on others.

I feel blessed to be surrounded by such amazing people. My 31st birthday was in August and its so strange but I really feel like I turned a corner and am coming into my own. My new mantra is "31 is going to be a good year"!

Labor Day Visitor

Labor Day weekend John's brother Justin came down from Boston for a visit. We love having visitors and had a jam packed weekend full of fun. Saturday we went to the Intrepid Museum which was really cool!

The Intrepid was an aircraft carrier during several wars and then became the recovery vessel for NASA. It's huge and has tons of really neat stuff as part of the museum.

The newest addition to the museum is the Space Shuttle Enterprise which just arrived this summer. Fun fact, the Enterprise is actually named after the Enterprise in Star Trek. Apparently there was quite a letter writing campaign to President Ford and the name was changed from Constitution :)

Since it was a game day we had to show our Razorback pride!

And then we started goofing off :)

After we exhausted ourselves at the Intrepid we made our way over to the Arkansas bar to watch the game. And to make a long day even longer we went to see an interactive play after that! Sunday we were all so tired we just hung out at the apartment and played Settlers of Catan  :)

Hilton Head

Since I turned 30 this year and my baby sister turned 16 the very next day I thought we should do something special so we went to Hilton Head for the week :)

None of us had ever been to Hilton Head but it was a short flight for John and I and my family drove to meet us. My friend Michael came with my mom and sisters and was way too nice and ended up driving them the whole 13 hours!

It was such a great trip, we stayed in a great house close to the beach that had plenty of room for all of us. We did a lot of relaxing at the house and a lot of cooking too. John got a little excited over actually having a grill so he grilled several nights we were there. Since we were in the South and had access to Walmart we made all kinds of good Southern food, cheese dip, spinach dip, you get the idea :)

Everybody checking out the beach on the first day :)

My sweet family brought me birthday presents :)

We spent a lot of time going between the beach and the swimming pool. We ventured out a few days to do some sightseeing and shopping. In the historic part of Hilton Head there was a nice area with a lighthouse so we went to check that out. The weather was beautiful the whole time we were there!

My mom and I at the top of the lighthouse

Me and my sisters at the lighthouse

Everyone enjoying the rocking chairs overlooking the harbor :)

Everyone besides John and I had to leave a day early to get back to Little Rock so the day that John and I had by ourselves we went on a kayaking tour of the marshes. It was a really nice relaxing outing and we even saw a dolphin :) 

John and I did some kayaking

Our flight was actually out of Charlotte and not until late in the afternoon so John and I got to spend a little time in Charlotte before we left. We decided to check out one of the plantations. 

Magnolia Plantation Gardens

Magnolia Plantation was founded in 1679! Its over 300 years old, crazy! We didn't go in the actual house but we wondered around the grounds and gardens, it was really cool. I loved the Spanish moss everywhere.

Magnolia Plantation Gardens

So fun to get to hang out with my family and have a nice relaxing vacation :)