Monday, December 9, 2013

My Tattoo

A while ago I got a tattoo :)
I had contemplated one for a long time but could never think of something I wanted to have on my body for the rest of my life. However, going through the process of separation and divorce I found myself clinging to a verse from 1 Corinthians about love.

"Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance." - 1 Corinthians 13:7

I know, I know, 1 Corinthians 13 is usually used in wedding ceremonies. At first I read this as I should never give up on my marriage and I should always stay hopeful, but the more I read it I started to realize that God is the one whose love never gives up or loses faith. Even though the man who promised to love me forever changed his mind, God will never do the same!

This became hugely symbolic for me as I was struggling with the idea of taking my wedding ring off. As something I had worn for so long, it was a comfort to me, a sense of security, and a reminder of all the good times in our marriage. Taking my ring off was scary and so painful. I wanted my tattoo to be a new reminder of God's love, the man who will never leave me. And so, I modified a tattoo I had seen online of an infinity symbol with the word love to have the L become a cross.

Wednesday, October 2, 2013

My Anthem

One of the things that really resonated with me throughout this whole situation was the song "Oceans" by Hillsong United. The song is about God calling you out into a scary, unknown place where you can learn to truly trust in Him. Obviously it makes sense why I love the song :)

The line about keeping my eyes above the waves was one I repeated to myself over and over. If I could just remind myself that God is so much bigger than what I was going through at that moment and focus on Him instead it really helped!

"Oceans (Where Feet May Fail)" by Hillsong United

You call me out upon the waters
The great unknown where feet may fail
And there I find You in the mystery
In oceans deep
My faith will stand

And I will call upon Your name
And keep my eyes above the waves
When oceans rise
My soul will rest in Your embrace
For I am Yours and You are mine

Your grace abounds in deepest waters
Your sovereign hand
Will be my guide
Where feet may fail and fear surrounds me
You've never failed and You won't start now

So I will call upon Your name
And keep my eyes above the waves
When oceans rise
My soul will rest in Your embrace
For I am Yours and You are mine

Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders
Let me walk upon the waters
Wherever You would call me
Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander
And my faith will be made stronger
In the presence of my Savior

I will call upon Your Name
Keep my eyes above the waves
My soul will rest in Your embrace
I am Yours and You are mine

Saturday, September 28, 2013

My Year

So its literally been a year since I last posted and it has been an intense year to say the least! Honestly it feels like its been even longer. This past year has probably been the toughest of my life but the whole thing has been an incredible growth experience and I am so excited to see where God is taking me.

For those of you who don't know, my husband of almost 9 years decided that he didn't want to be married anymore. Its so much more complicated but that's all I feel like diving into for now. John broke the news in January and moved out in March.

It was a long road to pick myself up off the floor and get to where I am now and I know I'm not done traveling, but I'm kind of proud of myself! Not to say I did it alone, I absolutely could not have survived this without God and my amazing family and friends. This has been such a learning experience in so many ways and one of them was me learning to lean on others.

I feel blessed to be surrounded by such amazing people. My 31st birthday was in August and its so strange but I really feel like I turned a corner and am coming into my own. My new mantra is "31 is going to be a good year"!

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Labor Day Visitor

Labor Day weekend John's brother Justin came down from Boston for a visit. We love having visitors and had a jam packed weekend full of fun. Saturday we went to the Intrepid Museum which was really cool!
The Intrepid was an aircraft carrier during several wars and then became the recovery vessel for NASA. It's huge and has tons of really neat stuff as part of the museum.
The newest addition to the museum is the Space Shuttle Enterprise which just arrived this summer. Fun fact, the Enterprise is actually named after the Enterprise in Star Trek. Apparently there was quite a letter writing campaign to President Ford and the name was changed from Constitution :)
Since it was a game day we had to show our Razorback pride!
And then we started goofing off :)
After we exhausted ourselves at the Intrepid we made our way over to the Arkansas bar to watch the game. And to make a long day even longer we went to see an interactive play after that! Sunday we were all so tired we just hung out at the apartment and played Settlers of Catan  :)

Sunday, September 16, 2012

Hilton Head

Since I turned 30 this year and my baby sister turned 16 the very next day I thought we should do something special so we went to Hilton Head for the week :)
None of us had ever been to Hilton Head but it was a short flight for John and I and my family drove to meet us. My friend Michael came with my mom and sisters and was way too nice and ended up driving them the whole 13 hours!

It was such a great trip, we stayed in a great house close to the beach that had plenty of room for all of us. We did a lot of relaxing at the house and a lot of cooking too. John got a little excited over actually having a grill so he grilled several nights we were there. Since we were in the South and had access to Walmart we made all kinds of good Southern food, cheese dip, spinach dip, you get the idea :)
Everybody checking out the beach on the first day :)
My sweet family brought me birthday presents :)
We spent a lot of time going between the beach and the swimming pool. We ventured out a few days to do some sightseeing and shopping. In the historic part of Hilton Head there was a nice area with a lighthouse so we went to check that out. The weather was beautiful the whole time we were there!
My mom and I at the top of the lighthouse
Me and my sisters at the lighthouse
Everyone enjoying the rocking chairs overlooking the harbor :)
Everyone besides John and I had to leave a day early to get back to Little Rock so the day that John and I had by ourselves we went on a kayaking tour of the marshes. It was a really nice relaxing outing and we even saw a dolphin :) 

John and I did some kayaking
Our flight was actually out of Charlotte and not until late in the afternoon so John and I got to spend a little time in Charlotte before we left. We decided to check out one of the plantations. 
Magnolia Plantation Gardens
Magnolia Plantation was founded in 1679! Its over 300 years old, crazy! We didn't go in the actual house but we wondered around the grounds and gardens, it was really cool. I loved the Spanish moss everywhere.
Magnolia Plantation Gardens
So fun to get to hang out with my family and have a nice relaxing vacation :)

The Big 3-0

So I turned 30 this year and I was really not looking forward to it. The weeks leading up to the big day I was certain I was going to have a melt down! I have been going through some rough stuff in my personal life and turning 30 seemed like the perfect opportunity to just lose it. Instead my amazing friends and family went above and beyond to make me feel so special :)

My birthday was on a Friday so I started the day with flowers on my desk from the girls at work.
Then we all went out to lunch, someplace Southern of course :)
After work John and I went to Ruth's Chris for my favorite kind of steak, the kind soaked in butter :) John kept trying to play it off like he didn't have plans for after dinner. In reality he had somehow managed to get us tickets to "The Book of Mormon"! He kept it a secret until we actually turned to walk into the theater. He said we were going to see "Phantom of the Opera" so that's where I thought we were walking. He then turned into the theater for "The Book of Mormon" and my mouth dropped open :)
The next day we went to a birthday party for my friend's one year old son. It was such a cute party and it happened to be on a rooftop in Brooklyn so it made for a perfect day. I made the smash cake for the birthday boy and then my friends surprised me with a cake of my own :)
After the baby festivities all the adults went out for drinks. It turned into an epic evening of drinking and dancing, something I probably haven't done since college :) I spent all of Sunday recovering from an awesome birthday weekend and then got ready for even more celebrating the next week!

My sweet friends from Little Rock coordinated with another friend who lives here to take me out for a manicure and dinner. Who doesn't love a manicure but then dinner at Dos Caminos on top of that! They even brought us champagne and birthday dessert :)
The next night a bunch of us all went out for drinks again. This time some of the girls that couldn't go out before got to join us. I think I did more drinking celebrating my 30th birthday than I did for my 21st birthday!

The next morning we got up and packed to go to the beach for a week with my family....awesome 30th birthday if I do say so myself :)

Summer Recap

I guess it really is true that time flies when you're having fun because here it is the middle of September and I haven't posted anything since July! The rest of the summer was just so much fun I don't know where the time went :)
Random summer evening at a rooftop bar
August was jam packed with fun stuff, one of those of course was my birthday! After that we went on a family vacation to Hilton Head, SC. The fun continued into September when we had a visitor for Labor Day weekend and then I took a quick trip to Salt Lake City. This weekend is the first one I've had in a long time where I didn't have plans or was out of town! I'm going to take the opportunity to do some blogging :)